Have you ever had an ongoing issue with your child that you were having a hard time figuring out?  Have you asked people’s opinions regarding your issue and none of their suggestions feel right?  Have you spent time searching for information through books and other resources for ideas and even tried some of what was suggested and it still didn’t solve your problem?  I have a feeling almost everyone can say yes to at least one of these questions.  Have you considered that the reason you are not getting the answer that works for you is because you are looking for it outside of yourself?

     The first thing you need to realize that you already know the answer to any of the challenges you are having with your child.  You are the expert when it comes to your child. You just need to learn to get out of your own way.  We tend to rely on experts with credentials way too much.  While the experts can help you, make you see things from different perspectives and even offer solutions that may work, only you know if any of them is worth giving a try.  Experts should never be overly relied on because you can end up ignoring your own intuition and when you do that, you risk losing your connection with your child.  You let yourself become the parent that others give you the advice to be and not the parent you know your kids already need.  Many of you will say “I don’t know what kind of parent my child needs right now.”  I believe feeling that way only comes from fear.  What you need to do at that point is to reconnect with your own voice and your own inner wisdom.

     I found that the best and quickest way to reconnect with your inner wisdom is to take a few moments to write down questions you would ask an “expert” about the issue.  Write your question down as completely as you can, read it to yourself, then think how you would answer the question as if someone else were asking you.  Don’t filter what your response would be out of fear.  Your only filter should be that of love.  If your child is being particularly difficult, which may make this exercise harder for you, try closing your eyes and picturing a memory you have of when your child was very young, where you were having a great time, laughing and having fun.  Then open your eyes and re-read your question.  You may not get the entire solution at one sitting and that’s ok.  You should at least have an idea of what to do just for today.  The answers you give yourself may surprise you.